a story of courage and suffering

Rev. Paul's story--a man of suffering and courage

I was born around 1949 in a village Lanyi in South Sudan. My father died when I was still in the womb. My first given name is Tapiako, and that means “no father.” We were born six children. All the other five children died. Then my mother died when I was nine years old. No one was there to care for me. I suffered a lot. At that time there was no church or school known by me. I was just in the bush, with the life of the bush. I was taken in by an uncle, an old man whom I helped as a boy until he died.

When I was there in the mud tukul there were goats and chickens also in that place. On one wall there was also printed in red an alphabet in English. I began to say my letters and by myself I learned to read a Moro primer without going to school. There were so many wild animals around, like leopards, hyenas, and lions. I felt danger around me.

One day the three children of my uncle, who I was sleeping with in the tukul, were taken by their mother. I was left alone again in the room that night . This big python entered the room. He ate the animals around me. I never knew that. I was sleeping. I wake up early in the morning and I scream. Many people came. When the community came they killed the python. People quarreled and asked the uncle why he had left me alone there. One community lady, a relative, took me to be with her. I was three days and then someone else came and said he wanted me. I went with him. I was eleven or twelve.

After two years another uncle came and asked me to come and live with him. I saw some school boys going to school and I wanted to join them but the uncle said for me to stay home and look after the farm animals so the wild animals wouldn’t eat them. After one year I went to school anyway. I started at grade two. I was doing women’s work since no woman was there to do the grinding of sorghum. This was humiliating for me as a boy but that was all I could do. Later, as I look back, I praise God since it was preparing me to help as a parent for my children, and do what I needed to survive.

In 1964 I passed class three. War broke out. We scattered into the bush eight years and in that time I became a Christian. The Bible became very important to me. Without that I would not be here. God revealed many things to me during that time in dreams and visions. One vision I got was that I was to cross a river balancing on a thread walking across the river. Another dream was so powerful that my left eye was blind for a very long time as a sign that God had spoken. I was also given the gifts of preaching and prayer. I was baptized in 1966 and took the name, Paul.

I grew up very risky. I faced many different things. I have no idea to marry. No one to support me for a dowry. After some time I gained courage and I asked one woman to marry, and she agreed. I went to Juba and cut grass for 3 months to earn money. I paid the dowry. We married. We have been blessed with 7children. Our first child is 21 now. She is a girl.

A main fear I have is of not having enough money to pay school fees. This year two children are in secondary school. Fees are 120 pounds/term/child. There are three terms in school year. Another child will be in secondary school in 2009. The remaining four children are in primary school where school fees are only 50 pounds/term/child. Fees go up every semester. My children want me to get another job with better money to pay for them better. I tell them that God will provide that; my calling is to be a pastor and I will remain to do that work. I want to serve my Lord until I go to heaven.

As a pastor my income is very small. Sometimes I plant maize (corn) and when I am doing my church work and return to my fields after some days it is all eaten by monkeys. I have a heavy load as a pastor. Last year my salary was 10 pounds and 24 cups of grain a month. This month they increased it to 50 pounds a month (about $25 USD). This is not enough to feed me and my family. One chicken costs that much.

Recently my church building was taken by the archbishop for his own and I was chased out of the building. My congregation meets with me under a mango tree. We are about 250, mainly children and women. We have begun to build another church. I need about $13,000 US dollars to finish my church building again. We need that for iron sheets, concrete, transport of materials. So that is my problem: children and church. When the church is finished being built I want to open a school for small children because I love them. I love children very much.